Amen and agghh!
An interesting thing happened in church Sunday night. First, you have to understand that our church encourages parents to use the nursery to “enhance the spirit of worship.” While we understand the point, we’re not sure how our children are supposed to learn to worship in church with us without being in the church service. So, we (along with about a dozen other families) take up residence toward the back of the balcony. That way, we cause minimal disturbance when the need to make a hasty exit with a noisy child arises. The second thing you must understand is that even though our church is a Baptist church, it has a reserved atmosphere. We don’t generally clap or jump around or shout “Amen!”
So, anyway, the choir finished a stirring choral number; and in the hush that followed, some guy (probably a guest) yelled out “Amen!” This happens from time to time, and nobody thinks much of it. This time, Andrew heard it and decided to follow suit. He made a loud, sharp noise similar to what he had just heard. Reflexively, I clamped my hand over his mouth and shushed him. I was startled, but not angry. I realized he must have thought it was OK, since the other guy did it. Andrew began to cry quietly — out of embarrassment and confusion, I think. Somehow, I whispered my way through a consolation and explanation so that he stopped crying before becoming a major distraction.
Really, I felt rather sorry for Andrew. He was just mimicking what he had heard and trying to participate. Being a three-year-old is difficult at times!
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December 6th, 2006 at 1:25 pm
Finding a small, family-friendly church might be on your short list of things to do in the New Year. This type of atmosphere would allow your youngster to learn and properly participate without embarrassment or confusion.
My two-year-old, Jesse, often enjoys “singing” along with the Congregationals, and sometimes adds his own “amen” at the end of prayers. Although we sit near the back of the church for those hasty exits, I’m guessing there are fewer rows in front of us than are behind you. That is unless you follow closely to the teachings of the Back Row Baptists.
December 6th, 2006 at 2:11 pm
I figured somebody would have a smart comment. The problem with a small church is that we would have disturbed the whole church. This way, we disturb just as many people but just a fraction of the congregation. Whatever that’s worth!
A new church has been on my mind for a long time — mainly because of the long drive three times a week. We haven’t switched yet because our friends are still there. As they graduate and move on, we’ll probably have less of a reason to stay.
For now, we’ve learned to work with the system; and our children (at least Andrew) are very well behaved for their ages. I like being able to hear the service in the lobby after the hasty exit — something another church may not provide.
December 6th, 2006 at 2:26 pm
Oh, I should add that the point I was trying to make in this post was not so much about our church as about a somewhat comical event that happened there with Andrew. Learning while growing up is often fraught with such situations.
It reminds me of the time I was about 10 years old in a Chinese restaurant. The waiter came by with a tray full of little dishes with interesting foods. Everyone was saying no thank you, but I saw something very interesting and grabbed it. Everyone laughed. I didn’t understand that the tray was full of appetizers the waiter wanted us to buy, not samples he was offering us.
December 7th, 2006 at 11:46 am
I love this post because of the seemingly contradictory statements. Ahem….
“While we understand the point, we’re not sure how our children are supposed to learn to worship in church with us without being in the church service.”
“So, anyway, the choir finished a stirring choral number; and in the hush that followed, some guy (probably a guest) yelled out ‘Amen!’”
“Andrew heard it and decided to follow suit.”
“I clamped my hand over his mouth and shushed him.”
So… how are your children supposed to learn to worship in church? I find the whole episode amusing. (BTW, I understand completely why you did what you did. I’m not criticizing; I just find it ironic.)
December 7th, 2006 at 11:54 am
Isn’t life full of ironies? I thought the episode was amusing, too. That’s why I posted it.
The important thing is to teach our children the proper way to act in each situation. In this setting, it wasn’t proper to shout after the choir song, and Andrew learned that — albeit the hard way!
Right now, the best way they can worship is to sit quietly. Believe me, that’s showing a whole lot of dedication for a three-year-old. Andrew doesn’t sing hymns yet, but I suppose that will come soon. His sister often makes noises during the hymns, and we don’t stop her. The difficulty comes when she tries to assist the soloists!
December 8th, 2006 at 10:16 am